While procrastinating cleaning my office closet, I found a crate of old journals and read the one from my senior year of college. I came across one particular entry from fall semester about my fiction writing class. I had completely forgotten about this incident, and now it’s gotten me thinking about the words we choose in our writing.
Part of our final exam was reading aloud something from our portfolios. I chose to read aloud a satire I’d written about wedding planning since I was in the midst of that myself. According to my journal entry: I’m a total goofball but I'm not naturally funny, so it sure was a relief when the class laughed in all the right places! But then when class was over, Rutabaga (His real name? Ha, no, but that’d be funny.) said, “That was great! You have a better personality on paper than in person.” I think my eyebrows raised so far up my head they were in my ponytail. I immediately got defensive and this popped out: “Hey. I was voted best personality in 8th grade.” Ugh, as if I made a point. 8th grade was a million years ago. He continued smiling and said, “Then it’s no wonder it was great. It just took this many years to come out.”
Yeesh. Rutabaga hadn’t said it meanly, and he’d been nice in class offering both praise and constructive criticism during workshops. He was a bit quirky, but what writer isn’t? Obviously I didn’t take it too personally since I’d forgotten all about it, but the journal entry made it clear that it had stung at first.
I ended that journal entry with this question: What exactly did he mean by better??? Did he actually mean I’m funnier on paper than in person or do I really have a mediocre personality?
Rutabaga has reminded me to be more specific in my writing. Are my characters’ choices and actions clear? Am I writing exactly what I mean and meaning what I write? Where are the ambiguities? Why is the character/situation vague? Is there a reason for it or do I need to tighten the pacing and action? What phrases and/or words take away from the overall meaning?
Checking for plot ambiguities could be a whole other post, but three ways I proofread for superfluous words in my writing is to eliminate adverbs. That’s quite a chore! I love adverbs: rather, quite, just, very, only, so, pretty, and all the -ly endings. It’s true that when read aloud, my writing sounds tighter without the adverbs. *sulking* Eliminating unclear phrases such as a bit, kind of, sort of helps make my writing precise. Above I wrote Rutabaga was “a bit quirky.” It’d be tighter if I’d written “He was quirky” and even clearer if I described a couple quirks. I also make adjectives specific or eliminate them altogether. Adjectives such as better, best, worse, less, short, and big could mean different things to everyone. Example: My youngest niece was born weighing 7 lbs 1 oz, which I think is small. Others consider small babies to be under 6 lbs and anything over that as average. Maybe that’s true, but to me 7 pound babies are small. So I finally I stopped telling people she was small and only told her specific weight.
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| Image obtained here. |
Though I have no idea what Rutabaga meant, it shows how important are the words we choose in writing and in life. What exactly does better or normally mean, anyway? It could mean something different to different people. Perhaps Rutabaga did mean funnier, or maybe he did think I was personable only in my writing and not in life. The point is, he could’ve been more specific. Then again, if he was, I wouldn’t have gotten this blog post idea or looked extra close at my revisions. Thanks, Rutabaga!
"The difference between the right word and the nearly right word is the same as that between lightning and the lightning bug." ~Mark Twain
"When you catch an adjective, kill it. No, I don't mean utterly, but kill most of them -- then the rest will be valuable." ~Mark Twain
Share with me!
Are you fond of adverbs and vague adjectives? How do you proofread ambiguous words in your writing?
16 comments:
LOL! That's a great story.
And it's also something to think about in narrative. While WE (as writers) need to be clear an unambiguous, it can be great fun to let our characters be like Mr. Rutabaga, and say thing that drive other characters to distraction with "and what did he mean by _that?_"
Adverbs are the bane of my existence. By that I mean that I love them but I have to slash them ruthlessly (haha - see how I worked that adverb in there?).
That's an awesome story! And, omg, I think people would say the same about me. I try not to think about it, though. ;) I do agree with many of your views about editing, making things tight, etc, but those potentially superfluous words can lend a cadence to the work that makes it shine all the brighter. :)
Loved the anecdote. ADVERBS! I hate 'em so much, but I use them all the time. ;)
I hate adverbs, but they slip through sometimes. Adjectives are even harder to catch. That's why revision is so important!
I love that! ANd yes I've fallen victim to the use of dreaded adverbs. Slowly I am extinguishing them. :) That's what edits are for, right?
Interesting story. :) I can't stand adverbs, but I sometimes use them without realizing it in my manuscripts (and I use them even more in my blogging). I'm learning not to rely on them and show the emotion using other words.
Details, and the right details, make or break a story! Neat story.
Holy crap it's like you wrote this for me!!! So I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one who dislikes adverbs either, several of your followers I've pretty much said everything I would have said... though I do love to stop by and say a quick hello :)
Great post. At least you inadvertently got some great advice out of his vague comment. :)
Loved the story! I like clean, spare prose and when it comes to slashing adverbs and adjectives, I'm ruthless. One of the reasons I blog is so I can get some of the adverbs, adjectives and other qualifiers out of my system before they end up in my WIP. :)
Daring- I know, isn't it funny? I wonder what Rutabaga is doing these days! You're right that ambiguity is good, as long as it's cleared up well in the end.
Talli- You worked in that adverb so lovingly! Heehee.
Kimberly- That's true. I suppose we have to pick and choose carefully, though!
B.- You hate adverbs? Oh, I love them!!! But it's a love that isn't good for my writing, oh no!
Natalie- You're right, adjectives are harder to catch! Good thing we can revise as often as we need to. Wait, did I say that was a good thing? Ugh!
T.Anne- Me too, I'm hoping my blog will get out all my adverbs and vague adjectives so I won't use them in my wips. It doesn't seem to be working, though, haha!
Shelley- I'm learning not to rely on them, too! It does make the writing interesting and tighter the more precise your words are.
Laura- You're right! Details, details, details are very important! I try to remember to use all five senses.
Jen- I'm always glad when you stop by to say hello! Thank you!
Stina- Yes, I did! So I'm grateful for Rutabaga, haha!
VR- That's what I just said above to T.Anne! My blog receives a lot of superfluous words, and my wips still are, too. *Sigh* But as everyone said, that's what editing is for! Sometimes it's fun to cut them away. They try to take over but I catch them!
I'm with Twain. I try to keep my adverbs to nil and adjectives to low quantities. If it is unnecessary, I cut it.
I lose a lot of wordcount that way... my last book was only 35kw.
But, you know, some people like to read and write that way, what with flowered words and all. Heck, I still read King and McCammon, two of the worst offenders I can think of.
- Eric
Interesting story. I love those quotes too. I used to overwrite like crazy - now I have to go back and add description. :)
hell yes
Eric- That's true! It's okay to use those adverbs and adjectives as long as you know when to cut them. Thanks for stopping by and commenting!
Jemi- I'm an overwriter for sure! I'm always cutting words and entire paragraphs. Ah, well, it's better for me to have too much then not have enough!
Creepy- Hear, hear!
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